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Posts filed under 'Zhang Ziyi'

Dennis Quaid Is Not Nearly The Terror Hottie Ziyi Zhang Is

Dennis Quaid is a busy guy these days–he’s showing up in TWO movies in the next couple months.  But we’re not here to talk about Dennis Quaid, no sir.  Dennis Quaid is not a terror hottie.  Not of the sort we handle, anyway–no, I’m here talking about Ziyi Zhang, who will be appearing alongside the Dennis in The Horsemen, a movie about a recently widowed detective–the Dennis, of course–who is not surprisingly still grieving over his wife’s death.  But here’s the thing–he’s discovered there’s a connection between him and the suspects in a serial killing spree that somehow involves the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.

I know, sounds like a real Hannibal meets Seven kind of thing, but it could still be interesting.  Especially with names like Ziyi and the Dennis in play.  It’s already been released in Italy, and apparently will be making it to a handful of theatres March 13th.  Not a very big handful from what I can tell, but still–theatres.

The Horsemen Looks A Lot Like Saw

(Zhang Ziyi)

But with a vastly better terror hottie–sorry Shawnee Smith, but you don’t swing a whole lot of weight against the terror hottie might that is Zhang Ziyi.

There’s a lot to arch an eyebrow about here, folks…just looking at some stills from the movie revealed plenty of what look like similarities, including some jury-rigged traps. And perhaps even more dubious is that The Horsemen will be helmed by Jonas Akerlund, an alumnus of the music video camp. Anyone else remember the various film tragedies that McG handled? Yeah, thought so.

Anyway, the plot on this wonder is nothing to write home about either, with a bitter, emotionally distant detective investigating a chain of murders and discovering a link between himself and one of the key suspects. The murders seem to be based on the biblical Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, which sounds almost thematically identical to Seven. And that’s an even darker sign. All the jury-rigged torture devices of Saw with the Bible-themed killing of Seven? Oof…that one sounds like a lead balloon about to burst.
But at least there’s a nice terror hottie involved in things, so that’ll make it at least one step above a complete waste at worst.