So there are rumors floating around—and in the spirit of all rumors they should be taken with a grain of salt the size of a cinderblock—that we may have a new terror hottie coming our way in the form of either Lacey Chabert or Ashlee Simpson via Grinder, a film that may not even have started shooting yet but is slated for a late 2008, early 2009 release.
Even if neither of these two actually makes an appearance, there will be plenty of terror hotties (not to mention personal favorite actor Sid Haig) involved to keep us all happy.
If you’re pulling off for the night on your way to a Thanksgiving break trip in a town whose sole claim to fame is being “the road kill capital of the world”, you probably deserve whatever happens to you because you are easily one of the biggest morons on the face of the earth. Thus, I’m not surprised that that’s the plot of Grinder. Seriously, who’s DUMB enough to stay in the one motel offered by a town that’s PROUD of its rate of accidentally killed vermin?
Worse yet, the entire town seems to be occupied by the Chapmans, one lone family that’s not very big, and a pervasive stink coming from the town’s old mill. Okay, okay…so the collective of college kids involved here didn’t CHOOSE to stay here—they were victims of the biggest horror cliché on earth: their car broke down. But in a situation like that, man, you all pile into the biggest room the motel’s got to offer and you sleep in shifts while armed. Because this is a horrible, horrible idea, and it’s going to make for a predictable but hopefully entertaining horror film for us when it’s finally released.